


in orbit

by fated_addiction



Category: Gundam Wing
Genre: F/M, Falling In Love, Friendship, Romance, Slow Burn, Slow Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-13
Updated: 2020-10-13
Packaged: 2021-03-08 00:34:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,645
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26996770
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fated_addiction/pseuds/fated_addiction
Summary: She is barely twenty minutes into her vacation before she drops the news.Relena is terrible at vacations.
Relationships: Duo Maxwell/Hilde Schbeiker, Relena Peacecraft/Heero Yuy
Comments: 5
Kudos: 31





	in orbit

-

She is barely twenty minutes into her vacation before she drops the news.

“I’m not running for re-election.”

There’s a pause and Hilde stares. The statement still has the intentional effect. Relena is deeply embedded in a quest to murder her apple slices, wielding a kitchen knife that makes Hilde equal parts uncomfortable and amused. They’ve been friends for years now; Hilde is privy to how Relena’s temper does manifest, be it kitchen knives or running six miles. She wears it well though, but Hilde still feels the need to intervene on humanity’s behalf.

“You _could_ just buy the apples pre-sliced,” she says dryly. She reaches forward, catching the other woman gently by the wrist. She even laughs at Relena’s blush. “And you know, I’m here to support you in whatever you decide to do.”

“I know.”

But that’s not it, Hilde thinks. It’s never been just that. Behind them, somewhere in the next room, Relena’s detail starts to reassert their presence in the house. There are low, heavy murmurs. The changing of the guard, or so the joke goes; it’s something she, personally, will never get used to.

“You can talk to me,” Hilde insists.

“I know,” Relena repeats. Draws back. She rubs her face with a hand. “I’m just tired. And annoyed. And tired and annoyed, you know?”

Hilde laughs. “I know.” She softens a little. “And I also know what’s on your plate, regardless of the fact that they’re saying you’re taking some time off for your health. I think this week’s speculation is a broken heart.”

Relena wrinkles her nose. “My publicist decided that. Not me. I thought it was rather dramatic, almost to the point where my mother thought I was actually sick. It’s still a mystery to me as to why people care that much.”

“Yikes.” Hilde sighs. “I’m sorry,” she says too. As if that would fix it.

“It’s not your fault.” Relena picks up the knife. “That was an awkward conversation, to say the least.”

Relena picks up an apple slice, her mouth twisting into some kind of smile. It’s mindfully sad, slightly guilty, and a number of things that Hilde can’t quite put her finger on. It’s in these moments that Relena could remind everyone that she is, in fact, a person and a little lonelier than most.

This decision, however, is not a surprise. She does wonder why Relena decided the here and now, but then again, that part doesn’t matter either.

Hilde sighs. “You don’t have to tell me.” She can’t hide her curiosity. “But who else knows?”

“You,” she says simply. There’s no hesitation. “And my mother,” she says too.

Hilde snorts. “That’s a lot of pressure.” She reaches forward, finally picking up an apple slice. “A lot of pressure, actually.”

Relena smiles, picking up another apple slice. “Or a pickle,” she quips.

Hilde knows there’s nothing else to say.

The decision didn’t come lightly.

The wide expanse of the Darlin manor keeps a lot of her secrets; when she runs, what better place is there to hide than with her mother? Her mother, Relena thinks, who is well-versed in shaming people into leaving her adult daughter alone, especially for needed privacy. This isn’t a secret though and when Hilde goes to bed, Relena sits in the kitchen with her tea and her gaze turned to the outside window. In fact, she almost says out loud, she might have been thinking about this for way too long.

It’s hard. She has honestly gone back and forth, up and down contingency plans and plans for contingency plans, as well as moments to talk herself back into moving forward. Who else would do this? That’s always the biggest strain of guilt. It leads her to think about her parents, dead and alive; of course, her brother and their relationship; there’s the people, Earth and the colonies, and the sleepless nights that lead her into moments, moments where she says things like: “This is why I do this!” and “It’s why you have to stay.” But now, even those last gasps to hold on are vanishing. It’s never been about what she _could_ do.

“How long have you been back?”

Her eyes settle on the windows again, painting out the reflection of a man behind her. The Preventers’ uniform isn’t the giveaway, but the familiar, _all-too_ familiar curiosity and tension that Heero brings is.

“And I didn’t make enough tea,” she says. Her head dips back, her hair spilling against the chair. “There’s water in the fridge.”

“Hn.” Heero remains behind her, unmovable at best. “You should be in bed.”

She rolls her eyes. “Whatever.”

He does eventually move to the refrigerator, grabbing two bottles of water. He also unzips his jacket, draping it over her shoulders before sitting at the kitchen table with her.

“I assume Duo is here.” Relena props a hand under her chin. “And Wufei?”

“They said you were sick,” comes the noncommittal response.

She snorts. “I really should fire my publicist for that.” She presses her fingers into her temples. “I’m really quite fine, just overworked and cranky.”

“You wouldn’t tell me anyway.”

Relena laughs, startled. Her gaze meets Heero’s with a bit of warmth. She feels her mouth turn into a smile.

“No,” she agrees. “I probably wouldn’t.”

If ever a moment for Heero to laugh, she thinks. He turns away, but she just catch the slight tilt of his mouth. She doesn’t wait for the moment - any moment, really. She used to sit in these silences with him, wanting to fill them. Job hazards, she thinks. Now, she doesn’t want to press. Or care to.

She picks up her tea, wrapping her fingers around the cup and returning to her thoughts. It’s not quite the companionable silence, but it’s enough. The first few days of any time, she’s usually insanely tense.

“You look tired.”

She blinks. “What?”

“You. Look. Tired.” Heero shifts in his seat. He finally twists the water bottle open. “Usually that’s not why you come here.”

“To my mother’s?”

She doesn’t know whether or not to be amused or irritated, given that he’s partially right and also stating the obvious. Her mouth opens to reply again, but Duo enters through the garden door. He’s mindful of his boots, grinning at her in greeting.

“Hilde?”

“Upstairs,” she answers. “Third bedroom.”

Duo’s shoulders sag, almost relieved.

“You’re still in trouble,” Relena adds. She watches Duo under her lashes. “She almost didn’t come when I invited her again.”

“Shit.”

Heero glares, but Relena laughs. Her head tilts and she puts her tea down.

“She’s awake. She’s probably using the bath. My mother stocked it up for her.”

Duo pumps a fist. “Your mom’s a saint.”

He bounds off and Relena shakes her head, not even bothering to ask. Upon her arrival, Hilde told her that they were taking a break again. That was after Relena decided to tell her what was going on.

She feels a little jealous though. Hates that she sometimes ventures there. It makes her too private, maybe even intensely so.

“I should go to bed,” she says finally.

She stands. Grabs her mug. She puts it in the sink and then comes back to grab a water bottle on the table.

“Are you running with me in the morning?”

Heero looks up at her. Almost surprised. Or, she thinks, something that looks surprised. It unsettles her slightly, but then she lets it go. History is forever complicated.

“Sure,” he says.

The jacket remains on her shoulders.

Relena is an early riser.

The estate has never been greener, odd given that the change of season is usual pretty severe. She still sees a dusting of colors in the trees, waving mindfully to the gardener switching out the rest of the summer plants for the new season. There’s an overabundance of oranges and golds and she takes a minute, breathing in the sharp, crisp air.

“Coffee.” Heero comes from somewhere near the house, jerking a cup into her hand. He’s tucked a pair of gloves with the mug and they fold into her palms as if they have already been there.

She snorts. “Thanks a bunch, dad.” Her hair is still loose. She tucks a few strands behind her ear. She’s already stretched and assumes that he’s fine. “Did you make it?” Her lips steal a sip. “Because if Duo did, I won’t sleep for the next few nights.”

“Wufei did.”

Relena hides a smile. “Fine.”

They fall into a companionable silence then. Relena puts her mug on top of the stone wall in front of her, flipping her head to pull her hair back into a messy bun. It’s too chilly to take off her long sleeve t-shirt, but she peels off the jacket that she’s wearing, folding it neatly by her mug.

Heero stays standing next to her, watching.

“Your jacket is in my room,” she says, shrugging. She pulls her leg up into one more, brief stretch. Then she reaches for her earphones. “Remind me to give it back to you later.”

He grunts in acknowledgment.

She takes off then. 

Those who have been in her detail know that she’s been an avid runner for years, given that it’s the only time she really, truly feels some kind of privacy. Sometimes she even takes on control. But she enjoys it, in particular, when she’s at home, climbing the hills, almost into the woods, and then weaving out. She listens to music and sort of fades into a zone, only slightly aware of the sweat that gather at the nape of her neck or the occasional beads that glide down her back. Somewhere in there, she’s also aware of Heero, Heero who keeps the pace but also maintains the distance, something that she’s always grateful for in these times.

It isn’t until her fourth mile that she decides to stop, her adrenaline pulsing and her knees tightening just slightly. Heero stops by her, his sneakers cracking against the leaves.

“It’s hot,” she complains a little. Then she peels off the long sleeve shirt, pulling it over her head. She forces it into a knot around her waist, rolling her eyes at Heero’s noncommittal expression. “I can hear you thinking. And yes, they might very well get a picture of me in, god forbid, my _sports bra_ ,” she says with mock indignation.

Heero chuckles then, the sound low and husky. He’s a little breathless. “It’s a good look,” he concedes.

She arches an eyebrow, swallowing back a blush. Thank god for politics, she thinks, especially in these moments. She’s never quite prepared for them. Occasionally, Heero decides to flirt, or flirt by his definition – something she is completely taken aback by, more so due to the fact that she is no longer fifteen and too busy to maintain a lifelong crush. If she were honest, she could have committed to falling in love with him but time has never been their friend and Relena can open her heart to only a lack of commitment.

“Why,” she drawls, “are you checking _me_ out?”

“Hard not to.”

Relena laughs, almost delighted. “All right then. I guess I should continue the show. Just for you.”

She turns herself back into a jog, amused even as Heero re-paces himself right next to her. She wasn’t entirely into the run today as it was anyway; today seems to just be a day that she should be outside. Maybe this, she thinks, is what she should look forward to.

She almost tells him then. That she’s not running for re-election. She bites her lip. Feels the words roll around in her head. Would he be disappointed, she wonders. Would there be no reaction at all? Or somewhere between the two. She has no idea. You would be the third person to know, she thinks. A carefully guarded secret. A heavy one.

“You’re happy.”

She blinks. “Me?”

“You’re not happy.”

“It’s fairly early in the morning, Heero. I’d appreciate it if you get straight to the point, given that this is my vacation.”

He sighs and stops. She stops too, confused. This is coming out of left field, or feels like it’s coming out of left field. His timing has always been terrible, she almost says.

“There’s something –” He seems to be struggling and she isn’t sure as to why. Her gaze remains steady as he hesitates. “You’re different from the last time I saw you,” he says finally. “I’m just wondering if you’re… okay.”

He’s worried. It’s not her first thought, but it’s there. Her mouth opens and closes. She rakes her teeth over her lip.

“Oof.” She sighs a little into a laugh. Her fingers tug at her ponytail. “Well,” she murmurs. “Given as this is suddenly a conversation you want to have, I guess I’ll have to humor you.”

“I’m serious.”

Relena’s gaze is just as sharp as his. “Me too,” she answers.

She looks away from him then. Looks back into the woods. Her heels dig into the ground, leaves crunching under her sneakers. The run is over, she thinks vaguely. It would probably make more sense for them to walk back at this point. She didn’t plan this. Doesn’t like that she didn’t plan this.

“You don’t have to worry about me.”

His fingers graze her elbow. “Relena.”

“I mean it.” Her mouth curls into a soft smile. “I’m not saying it’s not appreciated, but I also know you have a lot on your plate.”

“So do you,” he says dryly.

She smirks. “True.”

In her head, she imagined this moment with a lot more fanfare. She imagined she would probably tell him in a fit of anger, given that he pulls a lot of her temper out. She wouldn’t call their relationship volatile nor would she call them friends; they’ve simply existed in some kind of odd co-existence, the two of them naturally gravitating towards each other without thinking, most of the time.

Relena cranes her neck back, peering up at him. He hasn’t looked away. Her skin flushes with warmth then, unsure under his full attention and what to do with it. Her head spins a little. She’s never been able to lie to him as it is.

“I –” She sighs. “I wasn’t happy,” she starts slowly. “There’s a lot that I’ve had to think about and decisions that I’ve made that are… a little scary. I’m still a little wary about making them.”

“You haven’t made them yet?”

“Oh, no. I’ve made them.” Relena thinks of Hilde and their conversation in the kitchen. “It’s time that I made them. It’s really the first time that I’ve decided something this personal.”

“Are you dating someone?”

Relena snorts. Her immediate reaction is to hit Heero in the arm, her eyes narrowing in disdain. His expression is amused. Briefly, she swears she sees some kind of relief too.

“None of the rumors are true, you ass.” 

His smirk remains. “I know.”

“Ugh.” She shakes her head. “Nothing can get by _you_ ,” she drawls. “Good thing you’re great your job.”

“You’re terrible at keeping secrets.”

She can’t help but laugh. Her immediate response is to call him out – what do _you_ know, she almost says. It’s in the moments that she does remember how weirdly attuned they are to each other and how Heero, if anything, seems to rely on pure instincts when it comes to her. Something, she’s not entirely sure what to do with.

“From you,” she agrees. “Just from you.”

“So are you going to tell me?”

She turns, spinning on her foot in front of him. She walks backwards, studying his face. Her amusement remains.

“I don’t know yet.”

He frowns. “Relena.”

“I’m weighing my options.” She licks her lips. “Job hazard.”

Heero’s eyes drop to her mouth. “Uh-huh.”

And suddenly, it’s the tension that reappears, strong, maybe a little too thick but certainly palpable; they are adults and that opens a whole different league for the both of them. She could tease him – as she always has, she admits, something that she enjoys, for sure.

It’s just his expression changes and it’s just the two of them, deep into the property away from the eyes in the main house. She’s not worried, but she feels the tension sink into these butterflies, the ones that rise and fall in her stomach, waiting to explode.

“You don’t have to worry about me, Heero.” The sound of her voice drops and he steps forward, right into her space. “I promise,” she adds.

“You’re not going to tell me.”

He reaches forward too, brushing his fingers against her cheek. She inhales shakily, her eyes widening just a little. His fingers travel to her mouth and maybe, just maybe, it’s because she swallows or sighs but her tongue darts out and brushes against the pads of his fingers.

He doesn’t look away from her. Heat starts to pool in her belly. This is dangerous, she thinks. So, very, _dangerous_.

“Not quite yet,” she says.

Right then, Relena decides to run back.

“She’s not coming back.”

Hilde does not look up from her book in the kitchen. Relena has long disappeared upstairs to shower and her mother into the gardens. She’s seen the other Preventers, including Heero, but Duo seems to linger around her, regardless of being on duty.

“Stay out of it,” she warns lazily. She pushes her bangs out of her eyes, ignoring when he sits on the loveseat next to her. “It’s none of your business.”

“So you knew.”

Hilde looks up then. Her eyes narrow. “Stop being an ass.”

He grins widely.

It’s hard, she thinks, when their relationship feels more like something seasonal. He’s the proverbial flame to her mouth and it’s a source of fascination and irritation for her. The last time he came to see her on L2, they stayed in bed and she called out twice, only for it to end in a blowup fight about commitment and Duo’s inability to call her his _girl_ , floating around into other relationships, and screwing up hers.

“Of course, I knew,” she says. Her gaze returns to her book. “But leave it _be_ ,” she warns. “Or I’ll drown you in my really gorgeous, obscenely expensive bathtub upstairs. And Relena would let me get away with it.”

“No doubt,” Duo quips. He holds up a fist. “Girl power.”

She hits him. Hard. It sends him into peals of laughter and she supposes, given that she’s actually talking to him, it’s only to hide his victory dance of forcing her to spend time with him. He’s working, she tells herself. But when has that ever stopped him?”

“I’m glad that she has you.”

Startled, Hilde meets his gaze. He’s caught her hand, his long fingers grazing her palm. They travel down her wrist, slowly and softly, then pulling it into his lap. His hold on her hand is almost reverent and he sighs, his expression changing into something softer, maybe even serious.

“We take her for granted,” he says softly. His mouth purses and he shakes his head. “We all do. I’m surprise it’s taken her this long to make this decision. I think selfishly, we all held back on telling her too – you have a right to a life, just as much as we do. Your safety and security matter just as much as ours…” He sighs. “She’s done so much for all of us and never asked for anything back. That must do something to someone.”

Hilde is quiet. Maybe for a long time. She spots Heero coming up from somewhere in the gardens, nodding in passing to Pagan and the garden as he meets another security officer halfway.

Duo keeps hold of her hand. 

“She’s a lot stronger than you all give her credit for,” is all she says.

The truth is that Relena isn’t very good at vacations.

At a certain point, she begins to feel restless and useless, as if she could reallocate her time into something even more productive. It usually hits around the third night, but given the arrival of her Preventer-tailored security, she begins to think too much about the work waiting for her when she gets back.

“Maybe next time go to a beach,” Hilde suggests dryly. They’ve finished dinner and her friend even rolls her eyes at her confession. “Or a cabin in the woods where there’s no internet or people.”

“I’ve seen that movie,” she replies. “And it didn’t end well for all parties.”

Hilde shrugs.

Eventually, her friend drifts off to bed though under promises of an early breakfast and going into town with her mother, something that she has to do at least once while she’s here. Relena lingers in the kitchen though, putting the rest of the dishes away. Pagan has gotten used to her odd quirks; she’s lived by herself for years at this point and self-reliance is a drug.

She’s also been thinking about her run with Heero, or rather, just Heero in general. It’s harder when there’s nothing to cling to, no busy work or annoyances that manifest in the public’s obsession with her love life or lack there of. The tension has lingered for most of the morning and obviously well into the night, given that she can’t stop thinking about his mouth. Or telling him the truth.

“You have my jacket still.”

Relena jumps. Her eyes narrow. “Speaking of the devil himself,” she mutters. She turns, leaning against the kitchen sink. “I suppose I should give it back.”

“I do have others,” he says dryly.

She rolls her eyes. “It’s upstairs.”

She pushes herself away from the counter and he follows, wordlessly, down the hall and up the stairs into the private bedrooms. It’s a little quieter in the familial wing of the house; they pass Hilde’s door, subjected to low voices and then suddenly, a loud yelp – Duo, most likely. It’s nice to have people in the house, she thinks. It’s been harder over the years, knowingly viewing the hallways and not seeing her father. Guilt is always a strange ghost, appearing unexpectedly and cruelly, waiting for those hard, dark moments or the minutes when all you can hear is the silence. Guilt, no matter what she does, will stay with her.

Her bedroom door remains at the end of the hall, the door open and greeting them with low, soft lighting. Her laptop is closed on a small writing desk by the window, a mystery vase of flowers keeping it company. Heero’s Preventers’ jacket is looped around her chair and she grabs it gently, thrusting it forward for him to take from her.

“Here,” she says, and he reaches for it, his hands covering hers. He doesn’t take it from her though. “I promise it doesn’t smell.”

His mouth turns. “Thank god.”

Relena’s eyes widen. Then she laughs. “Jerk,” she says lightly.

He shrugs and then takes the jacket. There’s a pause and his hands stretch it out, wiping it out of its fold. She’s startled when he drapes it over her shoulders again, his fists winding around the lapels as he pulls her forward, almost into some kind of haphazard embrace.

“Heero?”

She’s breathless, that much she’ll admit, and the expression on his face is completely unfamiliar. Her heart starts to race.

“I’ve been thinking about you a lot,” he says slowly, as if to punctuate the words. He’s hesitant though. “It’s really hard to think about you. I’m not really good at thinking about you and controlling my thoughts.”

“Your thoughts?”

He nods. “Some of it is worry.” There’s a catch in his voice. “Are you safe? Can I do my job and maintain your security? Stuff like that.”

Relena sighs. “Heero –”

“It’s how I keep the rest of my thoughts in line,” he cuts her off. “Because if you’re safe, I don’t have to think about how tired you look. Or how at those damn functions some asshole cops a feel and how I _know_ it gets to you, even though you maintain your dignity with grace that I don’t understand, that seems ridiculously superhuman while I want to stab him in the throat. Because if you’re safe, I don’t have to think about how you’re not happy and how I want you to be _happy_ and how I don’t know how to do that but I want to do it anyway.”

Relena’s eyes are burning. This is coming out left field, she tries to tell herself. Does he know? Has she been _obvious_? Panic edges itself into her throat because she doesn’t know what to do. She makes a sound from deep in the back of her throat then too and his hands move the jacket to her face, cupping it between his palms.

“If you’re safe,” he says quietly, “I don’t have to think about how I want to know everything about you and not share you with the rest of the world, how fucking terrifying that is to me. Because, honestly, this is a realm that I am nowhere near close to understanding.”

Oh, she thinks. _Oh_. His fingers brush against her lips. She thinks she kisses them. Or breathes. It’s hard to distinguish which is which. Instead, her hands rise and she curls them in his shift, looping tightly around the fabric.

“Are you trying to be _romantic_?” Her voice is watery and she’s trying to fight the mess in her head. “Or are you trying to flirt with me to get my secrets, Agent Yuy?”

His laugh, oh god, his _laugh_ is a low hum that curls into her, pushing at the heat in her belly and she thinks, then and there, she might just tell him everything, every fear and obsession, every stupid thought and sad one. Leave it to Heero, she thinks, to take them from zero to a hundred, no explanation needed. But then again, weren’t they always headed here?

“Is it working?” he asks, voice still low. She catches the tail end of his sudden vulnerability and it disappears as quickly as it came.

Instead of answering, she pushes herself onto her toes. She leans in and her mouth grazes over his jaw, lingering just before she place a soft kiss on the corner of his mouth. His hands remain on the jacket and he keeps her close, even as she draws back to look at him.

She’s quiet, just for a moment longer, studying him openly. He meets her wordlessly, as she even tries to reprocess his words. 

“Yes,” she says. “Maybe not in the way you think –” Relena smiles a little, shaking her head. “But you certainly have a lot working for you and in your favor.”

He smirks. “Good to know.” Then he sobers just as quickly. He hesitates, yet again, as if the strain of talking unnerves him. “When you’re ready,” he says. “I can listen.”

It’s a turning point – Relena reads the signs just as well as anything else. The perks of being in politics, she thinks. It feels a lot like the stars have aligned and are finally showing her some kind of kindness. Or freedom, she thinks. She has too many memories of being a little girl with the stars and thinking about freedom.

But she’s also a big believer in give and take. Smiling, she pushes her fingers under his bangs and leans up again, kissing his forehead. Something seems to pass between them. A change? Another acknowledgment of a change? She doesn’t know anymore. Maybe she’s just excited, finally. Maybe it’s because it’s Heero and if anyone can understand her desire for space, it’ll always be Heero, in any capacity.

Relena feels herself breathe. Finally.

“Vacations,” she says, “are totally overrated.”

His amusement remains clear, like a promise. “You can keep the jacket,” he says.

**Author's Note:**

> Damn, it's literally been years since I've been on a Gundam Wing kick and here I am. I've always loved Relena and really have been fascinated by her transitions - child, teenager, and then adult, given that life she literally was thrusted into. The idea of an adult Relena have a relationship with an adult relationship with Heero and others is really fascinating too. Anyways, I could go on a tangent but I'll spare y'all and just hope you enjoyed it? And maybe I'll write a sequel? This was totally self-indulgent as it is.
> 
> Hope you enjoyed!


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